thebattleofloosingweight

Losing weight is an everyday issue that we all think about. From the thinnest person to the fattest person. Whether we like it or not. Or though we try to convince ourselves that we can care less. For those of you that walk around confident who say that weight is not a an issue. For those that walk around heavy saying that they love every minute of it and that have learned to love themselves for who they are. I’m calling you all out. I say BULLSHIT!

Personally I have been in both situations. As a teen I weighed 166 pounds at 13 years old and about 5′3 so yeah I was pretty heavy and I hated it. At that age I did what I could to loose weight. I did an all salad diet, a bean diet, a I am skipping some meals diet a liquid diet a no eating diet and finally a throwing up diet. Doing the throwing up diet as you all know it is called bulimia I lost all the weight. I was so weak and pale my mom thought I was doing drugs I didn’t have the energy for anything and I slept a lot. But I lost the weight. Was that not what I wanted? Yeah I got popular all of a sudden boys started to notice me as well as girls. I entered into high school and I started to work out and get involved in tons of physical activities. But every day I thought about food. Of how much I wanted it and when I had it of where I would go and throw it up. I was thin, fit attractive and unhappy. When I graduated and turned 18 I left the bulimia behind and focused on working out and eating healthy. Thinking of all the yummy fatty foods I wanted. I was always hungry. Miserable is how best describes how I felt.

Later I started to put on the pounds again I got married and at the age of 21 and at 5′5  I reached 176 pounds seems marriage makes people lazy or comfortable. So there I go again I got back into the self induced puking and I wanted to die I hated myself for letting me get to that point again. Refusing to let that take control over me I started to do research on dieting and how I didn’t want to do it anymore. All my research resulted in a great high fiber diet that allowed me to eat up to 8 times a day and I dropped the weight in 4 months a total of 70 pounds. Liter then ever I felt great and full of energy but was I happy hell no why because I had to maintain my weight loss. So finally this diet of mine worked so well that I was able to stay thin for a good 3 years. Now being able to indulge in a couple of things here, there and it not effecting the scale I was elated!

But then it came time to what? You guessed it family planning, having kids. Getting pregnant was great I loved it but even so I still ate healthy you know trying to keep the weight gain to a healthy minimum. Weight was still in my head. Now I have a wonderful daughter who is about to turn two and I am struggling to lose the weight that I gained. Back to the battle of losing weight! So you see what I mean when I call out bullshit. Because the mental and the physical struggle is never over. We are always battling ourselves on this weight loss issue. It is never ending. So for those of you that say you never think of weight that it has never crossed your mine that you have never had any issues. For the ones that are always constantly working out. Once again BULLSHIT! Weight will always be an issue.

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